Post by Deleted on Jun 19, 2013 5:19:22 GMT
Books.
So many books. So much knowledge. So many learned minds all condensed in one location. So many topics that cover other topics than cover ideas that cover theories. But one topic in particular still eluded her, ate away at her center. Surrounded by a small fortress of tomes, Mantle stares at one spread open on the table before her, a shroud of frustration and failure on her face. She knows why she has Cheery in her head, what triggered her 'birth', and she cherishes her Alter like blood, but the stoic woman cannot shake the feeling that something is missing. Something she was born with, but long forgotten since her rebirth. Master Amulet was not in the library for once, so Mantle had free reign over its contents. Mainly those dealing with psychology and her affliction.
For hours she poured over every detail she could get her hands on. She got a basic understanding of thing, the science behind it and how it supposedly affected Demons, but none of the pages contained what she was looking for. All these brilliant minds could not describe this....odd feeling deep in her gut. Sharp, yet blunt. Solid, yet hollow. it sat in her like a proverbial brick, weighing her thoughts down, distracting her from the norm. Closing the book before her, she folds her arms over it and rested her head in them, staring forward with disdain. Why is she feeling sad all of a sudden? Not a large sensation of the emotion, but enough to notice. Other that the (slowly increasing)visits with Beret and various training sessions, the only person she has daily interactions with, was Cheery. Was this the line, was she finally going mad?
Speak of the devil, Mantle can hear her other self whispering from some corner of her mind. Strange thoughts drift through her head, thoughts she has never had before. Why does she not want full control? Does she even have free will? Is this other me just me wearing a mask, preforming an act in public to simply alleviate the pain? Damn these quacks for planting seeds of doubt...then again, what if that IS the truth? Perhaps she is still coping with all this information even after a year since being born again. Maybe Cheery wasn't truly real, does that mean that she is un-needed? It may appear unhealthy to some, but this Alter, as she calls it, was a safety net, ready to catch her until she has conquered her fears. Through her, she has began social interaction again, and all those feeling and emotions that her mind locked away in a desperate attempt to calm her stressing mind were gradually leaking back out. Even if the day comes when Cheery was no longer needed, the memories will still be there, like an long lost photo of an old friend found after many years.
Mantle looked at her left hand, flexing the fingers a little while turning it from side to side. Perhaps this forced wedlock that Tiara smuggled her into could be used as another stepping stone of sorts. At the very least, she would have another person to talk to regularly, despite the awkwardness of the situation. But on that thought, it looks like Cheery may still be needed for a while longer.
So many books. So much knowledge. So many learned minds all condensed in one location. So many topics that cover other topics than cover ideas that cover theories. But one topic in particular still eluded her, ate away at her center. Surrounded by a small fortress of tomes, Mantle stares at one spread open on the table before her, a shroud of frustration and failure on her face. She knows why she has Cheery in her head, what triggered her 'birth', and she cherishes her Alter like blood, but the stoic woman cannot shake the feeling that something is missing. Something she was born with, but long forgotten since her rebirth. Master Amulet was not in the library for once, so Mantle had free reign over its contents. Mainly those dealing with psychology and her affliction.
For hours she poured over every detail she could get her hands on. She got a basic understanding of thing, the science behind it and how it supposedly affected Demons, but none of the pages contained what she was looking for. All these brilliant minds could not describe this....odd feeling deep in her gut. Sharp, yet blunt. Solid, yet hollow. it sat in her like a proverbial brick, weighing her thoughts down, distracting her from the norm. Closing the book before her, she folds her arms over it and rested her head in them, staring forward with disdain. Why is she feeling sad all of a sudden? Not a large sensation of the emotion, but enough to notice. Other that the (slowly increasing)visits with Beret and various training sessions, the only person she has daily interactions with, was Cheery. Was this the line, was she finally going mad?
Speak of the devil, Mantle can hear her other self whispering from some corner of her mind. Strange thoughts drift through her head, thoughts she has never had before. Why does she not want full control? Does she even have free will? Is this other me just me wearing a mask, preforming an act in public to simply alleviate the pain? Damn these quacks for planting seeds of doubt...then again, what if that IS the truth? Perhaps she is still coping with all this information even after a year since being born again. Maybe Cheery wasn't truly real, does that mean that she is un-needed? It may appear unhealthy to some, but this Alter, as she calls it, was a safety net, ready to catch her until she has conquered her fears. Through her, she has began social interaction again, and all those feeling and emotions that her mind locked away in a desperate attempt to calm her stressing mind were gradually leaking back out. Even if the day comes when Cheery was no longer needed, the memories will still be there, like an long lost photo of an old friend found after many years.
Mantle looked at her left hand, flexing the fingers a little while turning it from side to side. Perhaps this forced wedlock that Tiara smuggled her into could be used as another stepping stone of sorts. At the very least, she would have another person to talk to regularly, despite the awkwardness of the situation. But on that thought, it looks like Cheery may still be needed for a while longer.